Remember Physics class in junior high when your final project was to insulate a box to maintain a specific temperature? Well, the dress super (nose job) model Bella Hadid is wearing was exactly the NASA assets I used to get an A+.

If this dress is considered fashion, then I have a fantastic timeshare property to sell you on Mars. Once again—disclaimer—I am not a fashion expert, just not an idiot.

Bella, next time “just say no.” It’s your family brand on the line as well. There is no need to promote a space camp … or a fake fat camp.